One: Martha Stewart's decided on a tagline for her great, great new show "No One Gives a Rat's Ass," the tagline she'll use to can people a la Donald Trump's "You're fired." Ready? Here it is:

You just don't fit in.

I don't know... it's bitchy, like Martha, but it lacks the decisive punch of "You're fired." It's more like a group of pre-teen bitches at sleep-away camp telling the new girl why she won't be invited to make S'mores around the fire. A kind of damning, blanket statement that crushes a young girl's self-esteem, without being precise about exactly what the problem is, thereby causing her to withdraw further into her fantasy world and grow up to be a bitter online journalist.

Where was I? There was something else.

Oh, right.

Do you want to make more money? Sure. We all do. Enroll in the Aging Rocker School of Art today, and in no time you'll be cranking out "limited edition" giclee prints of classic rock-inspired crap, just like Grace Slick! Remember: there is no legal definition of "fine art," so grab a pencil and a news clipping of Janis Joplin, and go to town.

That is all.

P.S.

Ok, that was clearly not all, but smedindy sent me a link to more fabulous celebrity art, which contains not only the Ron "Ronnie" Wood oeuvre of aging rocker portraiture, but a thoughtful blue study of Sting [over on the right, in periwinkle] as realized by Ms. Grace Slick, accompanied by her assessment that Sting "seems to embody contemplating mastery." Other than the fact that her glowing yet oddly worded praise seems to be some kind of Zen booty call, I totally agree with her sentiment. Sting does strike me as resembling a man who would think about the concept of being really good at something.

OK, THAT is all.

Star of the day. . .Jorma Kaukonen