Like it or not, today's theme is love: love, or not having a boyfriend. Or girlfriend. Love, love, love. We all love love.

I love Valentine's Day because people who celebrate it always apologize for it, shrugging while explaining their dinner plans, "I know it's a totally manufactured Hallmark holiday, but..." There's always that "but," and then they dress up and go get that steak dinner, or whatever. Send each other teddy bears holding satin hearts.

People not in relationships fall into a number of categories on Valentine's Day:

• Wistful


• Embittered/yearning for past relationship


• Let's-Make-Bouquets-and-Give-Them-To-Ourselves/Who needs men?


• Embittered in general, not specifically Valentine-related


• Oblivious/Drunk

I am solo this Valentine's Day, (I probably fall into that last category, although I am not technically drunk at this exact moment), but Tahmi invited me out for a drink after work, a very generous offer on her part because I am not only unshowered, but I am wearing no makeup. (Note: and yet I remain foxy. Discuss!) When I revealed my status to her, offering her a chance to beg off, she didn't take the bait. I feel that having a drink with her in my current state is the best Valentine's Day gift I could give any friend. Wherever we go, people will look at her as if she is Mother Teresa for being seen with me, and she will look so spectacularly beautiful by comparison that men will fall down with wonder and beg for her e-mail address. (This is just another way that I use my "selfless" nature to enrich the lives of others.)

Inspired by seeing Jonathan Richman on Friday night, and his song "Not so much to be loved as to love," I have decided to dedicate today to not obsessing over the fact that no one will ever tell me, as my friend Benton told his new wife Carly at their wedding Saturday, "I promise to spend the rest of my life making you laugh, and making you feel beautiful." Instead, I will love. I will not ask to be loved, I will just love.

I will be the first to admit that I'm looking for at least a small pay-off; I mean, loving and NOT being loved back adds up to a big fat case of stalking, if you ask me, and that's just not my scene, man.

So, in pursuit of this new altruistic goal, I spent time on my way to work thinking about love in a general sense. I put out the vibe, there in my car. And I think it was successful, because when I got to work, I received the following valentine via interoffice mail:

Left to right, that's Tom Waits; Michael Dukakis; and John Convertino, the drummer from Calexico. I have never even met any of these men, so the fact that they jointly sent me a valentine speaks volumes about the power of my altruistic love.

Happy Valentine's Day, you all.

Violet (that's me!) loves you.

P.S. Stop ragging on my layout--I'm still working on it!

Star of the day. . .Cupid