The ethereal Miss Cloudy tagged me to list six weird habits I have. I believe I participated in this exercise previously, but how can I refuse? It's not like I've run out of weird habits to discuss.

So, with that, in the spirit of cooperation, here are:

SIX (more) WEIRD HABITS OF ME, VIOLET

1. I enjoy naming household objects. Many people do this, I'm sure, so this isn't really terribly weird. I just like to have lots of little friends around. Little, inanimate, silent friends. With whimsical names. I like it when they talk to me and make me feel safe. Like this morning, when I woke up stressed out about money, and the Keelhauler mumbled, "Don't have a conniption," which was infuriating and rude. Instead of picking a fight with him, I took a deep breath and turned to my old friend Blanky Blankelberry, a darling old starter's pistol, and fired off a couple of shots right above the Keelhauler's ear. When the smoke cleared, I felt SO much better. Thanks, Blanky Blankelberry!
2. I like to photograph my friends "in the nude" using my Polaroid, when they're asleep. This isn't really so weird, either, if you think about it. I mean, most people, when posing nude, get all "uptight" and "awkward," resulting in artificial, strained facial expressions and unnatural hand positions. Sleeping, people are relaxed, and the resulting photos much more elegant, if slightly shadowy. It's just a little hobby I enjoy.
3. I become enraged when passers-by ask for the time. I guess this one speaks for itself.
4. I have an "Arm Gesture of the Day" and keep detailed records of same dating back to 1996. Today's Arm Gesture of the Day is The Showcase Spectacular, performed by extending the right arm leftward, at chest height, across the body, with palm down. Next, quickly flip to "palm up" position as the arm is moved grandly to the right, stopping when arm reaches full extension on the right side. It's fun to do and useful for indicating, for example, the location of the photocopier. Try it today!
5. Sometimes, when I'm alone, I feel nervous about marionettes. Like they're looking at me, but I can't see them. (Note: this is just residual fear from a time when marionettes actually were looking at me.)
6. I enjoy imagining how the world would look if the color blue were replaced by a new color, a color I call "plambar." Plambar is exactly like blue, only slightly less so.

And there you have it.

Star of the day. . .Stephen Colbert XOXO