Keep those cards and letters coming

Friends: are you feeling a bit "down" over the recent death of the pope? Don't keep those feelings in--write your local newspaper so that everyone can share!

Well, write MY local newspaper, anyway. On the front page, there's an invitation that reads:

Please send us your thoughts and condolences to

[email protected]

"Popethoughts." I like it. Dignified, yet frisky, with just a hint of Orwellian Newspeak. I am guessing that whoever set up that mailbox is soliciting thoughts about the pope, rather than the types of thoughts I have during the day, which I type, unedited, directly into this journal, and do not share with the local press.

Probably, the mailbox will get a slew of rambling notes from old ladies named Mrs. Herb Greenhalch or something, telling how she and Mr. Greenhalch went to see the pope in New York in 1966, which then gradually deteriorates into a general complaint about all this terrible nudity and cursing in films today. And my town paper being what it is, each of these letters will be printed, unedited.

But condolences? It is my understanding that condolences are expressly conveyed to the immediate family, and possibly friends, of the deceased, but that's probably just my stodgy New England etiquette craning its grey and bitter head. I live in Southern California now, and no one cares about the rules. No one even knows the rules. I should stop caring.

But really, why would anyone send condolences regarding a person he's never met, to a newspaper? Maybe the pope "moonlighted" there, or something, before his appointment. I'm curious to see the way the condolences are worded, and to whom they're addressed.

Dear Editor/s:

Janine and I are so totally sorry about your loss of the pope. It is our loss, too, we were both baptized Catholic, although we haven't "gone to church" for a super long time. Christmas and Easter, yo. We're more "spiritual," and all and think organized religion "sucks," but me and Janine still totally loved that pope, and the world is seriously lesser for not having him here any more. "Our prayers are with you."

Peace--
Derek "Surf Dog" Winters

Wait. I think I just talked myself out of any curiosity I might have had.



Star of the day. . .Bernadette
posted @ 3:00 p.m. on April 06, 2005 before | after

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She lay awake all night,

zzzzzzzzzzz......