In which I accept a compliment

First, an apology: I should have realized that you would not roll your eyes over a simple mention of Jessica Fletcher. I apologize. I believe that Jessica, under the same circumstances, would apologize for underestimating you, and so I am following suit.

We have so much to learn from Jessica, or Mrs. Fletcher, as she is customarily addressed by residents of Cabot Cove and later, Manhattan, after she left Maine to claim her place in the mystery writers pantheon. I prefer Cabot Cove Jessica to Manhattan Jessica�largely a function of my distaste for the boxy suits she wore in the city�but both Jessicas are so soign�e, so gentle, and yet plucky and crime-fighting, that I feel petty, trying to find fault.

Here is one thing that Jessica has taught me: How to accept a compliment. Do you have trouble accepting compliments? Well, then, read along and learn! Learn with ease, the Jessica Fletcher way, and increase your perceived graciousness and charm with these six simple words:

What a lovely thing to say.

Ideally, you will deliver this line with a modest tilt of the head and a smile. OK, it is practice time. Ready? I�ll be the complimenter, and you be you, OK? Now, go!

Complimenter: You always look so put-together. I love that scarf/hat/haircut/turban.

Complimentee (YOU): [head tilt, smile] What a lovely thing to say.

See? That was not difficult in the least. Even a star-nosed could pull it off with no effort at all.

There is also this variation:

What a lovely compliment.

Add a head tilt and a smile, and you are Jessica Fletcher. In truth, no one likes to deliver a compliment and have it received with snorting giggles and denials, or, worse, self-aggrandizing agreement. Next time you hear a compliment, think, �What would Jessica do?� and nod, smile, and deliver your line. It will make you instantly popular and credulous.

On a related note, my dear friend SueB went, a few months back, to New York for the opening of a new play written by her brother-in-law and starring Jessica Fletcher in her persona of Angela Lansbury. SueB reported back to me that there was a lot of cursing in the play, particularly the C word, by Ms. Lansbury, which she found slightly startling. At the cast party afterwards, SueB talked with Ms. Lansbury and mentioned how startling it was to hear Jessica Fletcher say the C word. �What will they think in Crabapple Cove?� she asked, and I am proud to relate that Angela did not correct her. Instead, she smiled graciously and said, �Oh, yes, well, it�s all in good fun.�

SueB, sensing an opening, told a story about a time long past, when I�d gotten fed-up with her heebie-jeebies every time she encountered the C word. �She made me say it one million times, until it lost its power,� she said. Angela smiled and said, �Well, I think that�s brilliant.�

What a lovely compliment! [head tilt, smile]



Star of the day. . .Sir Edmund Hillary
posted @ 5:21 p.m. on January 10, 2008 before | after

|

She lay awake all night,

zzzzzzzzzzz......